I've just had a fabulous weekend with my very lovely 'mum' Janny P and some of the Jamily crew. Twas very good fun, albeit a little strange at times (that's not how I remember Michael Jackson...!) but honestly, I can say I'd forgotten how good it is to be happy, tired and to have cheeks that hurt from laughing and smiling so much! I suppose it breaks up the mundane. If only life could be like that every day...
So, Sturica Bump has been to his/her first 2 gigs; Jamiroquai @ the O2 and Incognito @ the Bunn Leisure/Bum Pleasure park (hahahaha!). As Peggy said, this is going to be one funky baby! I might as well sort out his/her musical tastes early. My mother told me she used to play Stevie Wonder when I was in the womb. Babies can hear music and familiar sounds and recall them once out of the womb, so I'd like to think if I play enough funky, soulful vibes they'll grow up with a solid back ground of old school music which will lead them to good artists of the present and future.
Right, flaming tired as always and Stu is already snoozing behind me. Thank goodness I still have one more day off!
Sunday, 17 April 2011
Wednesday, 13 April 2011
Return
Hola!
As per flaming usual I have neglected something I started which is the basis of my whole life. That sounds like a bad omen for having a child, eh? Ha, of course no such thing ever happens when that situation or person is so important.
Between our trip to Scotland (very nice, weather was a bit funny here and there) and having a horrific cold (and a lovely cold sore to boot, the first for about a decade) I have been quite occupied and tired.
Went for another midwife appointment yesterday. What I said on the way home about the NHS shall not be repeated on here, but I am happy to let all that trivial stuff that used to really grind my gears blow over me now. Yes, I still get angry, but not for long, and I know I have a lot to be thankful for. Anyway, it was nice to hear the baby's heartbeat again (heard it last week when Stu and I went to the Ante Natal clinic at the hospital for another appointment). So magical to imagine this little thing is not only growing beautifully inside me, but that it's also having a mini rave to pass the time! 149BPM+ the midwife measured his or her heart rate at yesterday. Considering I constantly worry that something bad must have happened because... well... nothing's happening. Everything is fine.
I know it's silly to worry and it's really part of my nature that is amplified at the moment (mainly due to hormones). Obviously this is all very new to me, and the little I knew has been completely blown out of the water by what I've learned in the past 3 months. I worry if I am sick, I worry if there is random pain, I worry when I feel a flutter, I worry when I don't feel anything all day, I worry because my symptoms have completely calmed down (other than the odd sick moment or headache), I worried about the cold and the cold sore but apparently that isn't a problem and my immune system is going to take a battering during this time. I worry when I wake up lying face down in bed (pointless as the little thing is very well protected in there, and by the time it gets bigger I won't be able to do that anyway!), about eating something 'prohibited' by accident, about money (although Stu has just started a full time job so that's taken the pressure off and made us both really happy), about putting on too much weight, about not eating enough, about losing weight afterwards, about getting so flaming big that I can't bend over to tie up my shoes, about me or the baby becoming ill before the birth... and on and on and on it goes. This is probably why I can't sleep, huh? Well, that and a constant need to empty my bladder.
I am sure of this, though - my worrying means nothing. My sixth sense is pretty good and if there really was something wrong, I would act upon it rather than sitting about fretting.
The thing I worry about most is giving birth. It's the one thing I said I would NEVER EVER do, mainly because it looks and sounds far too painful to be something you just casually forget. All my brain keeps saying is "How is that big thing gonna come of that small hole?" which yes, I know the technicalities of the process, but physically and psychologically it freaks me out. I always said if it came to the crunch I'd have an elective Caesarian. Now I'm more informed (because I have to be, grrrr) I understand the potential issues with that and how it will affect my body in the important months after little Sturica Bump is here. I don't think it's always about being 'too posh to push'. I don't think many women really want to be almost literally gutted and then spend months recovering (though if they decided to do a tummy tuck while they were there, that could kill 2 birds with one stone and be more attractive ;-p). Honestly, I am leaning towards natural birth now, but I am still very scared and avoiding the issue for as long as I have to. I even skip those pages in the books and magazines I read and I have not seen one episode of 'One Born Every Minute'! I will have to face my bete noir eventually but for now my head is buried rather firmly in the proverbial sand.
As per flaming usual I have neglected something I started which is the basis of my whole life. That sounds like a bad omen for having a child, eh? Ha, of course no such thing ever happens when that situation or person is so important.
Between our trip to Scotland (very nice, weather was a bit funny here and there) and having a horrific cold (and a lovely cold sore to boot, the first for about a decade) I have been quite occupied and tired.
Went for another midwife appointment yesterday. What I said on the way home about the NHS shall not be repeated on here, but I am happy to let all that trivial stuff that used to really grind my gears blow over me now. Yes, I still get angry, but not for long, and I know I have a lot to be thankful for. Anyway, it was nice to hear the baby's heartbeat again (heard it last week when Stu and I went to the Ante Natal clinic at the hospital for another appointment). So magical to imagine this little thing is not only growing beautifully inside me, but that it's also having a mini rave to pass the time! 149BPM+ the midwife measured his or her heart rate at yesterday. Considering I constantly worry that something bad must have happened because... well... nothing's happening. Everything is fine.
I know it's silly to worry and it's really part of my nature that is amplified at the moment (mainly due to hormones). Obviously this is all very new to me, and the little I knew has been completely blown out of the water by what I've learned in the past 3 months. I worry if I am sick, I worry if there is random pain, I worry when I feel a flutter, I worry when I don't feel anything all day, I worry because my symptoms have completely calmed down (other than the odd sick moment or headache), I worried about the cold and the cold sore but apparently that isn't a problem and my immune system is going to take a battering during this time. I worry when I wake up lying face down in bed (pointless as the little thing is very well protected in there, and by the time it gets bigger I won't be able to do that anyway!), about eating something 'prohibited' by accident, about money (although Stu has just started a full time job so that's taken the pressure off and made us both really happy), about putting on too much weight, about not eating enough, about losing weight afterwards, about getting so flaming big that I can't bend over to tie up my shoes, about me or the baby becoming ill before the birth... and on and on and on it goes. This is probably why I can't sleep, huh? Well, that and a constant need to empty my bladder.
I am sure of this, though - my worrying means nothing. My sixth sense is pretty good and if there really was something wrong, I would act upon it rather than sitting about fretting.
The thing I worry about most is giving birth. It's the one thing I said I would NEVER EVER do, mainly because it looks and sounds far too painful to be something you just casually forget. All my brain keeps saying is "How is that big thing gonna come of that small hole?" which yes, I know the technicalities of the process, but physically and psychologically it freaks me out. I always said if it came to the crunch I'd have an elective Caesarian. Now I'm more informed (because I have to be, grrrr) I understand the potential issues with that and how it will affect my body in the important months after little Sturica Bump is here. I don't think it's always about being 'too posh to push'. I don't think many women really want to be almost literally gutted and then spend months recovering (though if they decided to do a tummy tuck while they were there, that could kill 2 birds with one stone and be more attractive ;-p). Honestly, I am leaning towards natural birth now, but I am still very scared and avoiding the issue for as long as I have to. I even skip those pages in the books and magazines I read and I have not seen one episode of 'One Born Every Minute'! I will have to face my bete noir eventually but for now my head is buried rather firmly in the proverbial sand.
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